Welcoming Fear Back Into The Conversation

What have you heard about fear lately? That you should overcome it? Put it aside? Push through it? Do we even know what fear is anymore?  There are many fear shaming messages out there:

  • Fears are stories we tell ourselves.
  • Never let your fear decide your fate.
  • Confront your fears-list them, get to know them, then put them aside.
  • There is no illusion greater than fear.

If these ideas worked than fear wouldn't need to surface again. So why does it keep coming back?

It keeps coming back because it is our connection to our deepest, most ancient, and most primal wisdom. Yup. I said it. Fear is wise. In fact, you use your fear all the time and you probably don't even know it. Say you step down off of your deck and you feel something squishy and not like the ground you usually step on. You pull your foot up faster than you can run away and you look down to investigate. And there is a snake! Holy cow! Stop right there. How do you feel?

Most people think fear is the feeling you feel immediately after you make a death-defying action that saves your life. But fear is actually the thing that oriented you to the hazard-the squishy feeling that wasn't the ground, and fear is the thing that gave you the fast energy to lift your foot up, jump back and investigate the situation. Fear is actually that calm, fast acting energy that saves your life and helps you make decisions that work for you.

The question you can ask yourself the next time you sense that fear is holding you back.

What action should be taken? 

Take note of what comes up, and notice if your fear is alerting you to possible hazards.

Is there more than one option to get to your destination?

Can you make a plan that helps you overcome obstacles in a way that doesn't cause you harm?

Can you take one small step today towards your goal?


A DEI Practice for fear:

Now that you are grounded. focus your attention on your fears. Prepare yourself, act and move consciously, and revitalize your psyche with the dynamic focus fear brings you. 

The question you can ask yourself is:

What action should be taken? 

Take note of what comes up, and notice if your fear is alerting you to possible hazards.


By taking the idea that some emotions are negative out of the conversation, we are able to create space to explore more options that are available to help us make the movements we want to make in our lives. By welcoming all of our emotions as necessary, vital and intelligent we connect to our deepest brilliance.

I hope you have found this post helpful. 

Do you think you might incorporate the Grounding and Focusing exercise in your life?

How has your fear served you?


Are you in a experiencing difficulty moving forward in your life in a way that is meaningful to you? If you are, let's explore the gifts in your emotions are bringing to your situation in a consultation.

If you’re generally capable, naturally intuitive, and focused, you’re actually already connected to your free-flowing fear (even though you may not think of yourself as fearful).
— Karla McLaren






Andrea Watkins